DanrBoston - welcome to PGL. uPnp is funky. For some reason I had to turn it on, then off, then on, then off or something to that effect in order to get the forwards to actually take. Unfortunately I don't completely understand why it did or didn't work like it was supposed to. Perhaps it was my Linksys, perhaps it was something else.
Lets start by breaking down your issue. First, what type of router are you using?
When you turn off uPnP you cannot connect to the internet you say? But if you turn it on, it won't forward the ports?
You should be able to forward the ports regardless of your upnp setting. Forwarding the ports should not affect your ability to get online. Give it a shot and then check back in here.
